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Insights - When Your Job Drains You

By Patricia Wall © 2008 Insights Column since 2002 Tone Magazine Feb 2008

A man stays in a job that leaves him gray and exhausted at the end of every day, because he has a family to support and a personal commitment to support his children’s education.

A woman faces vile office politics including gossip, backstabbing, sabotage, criticism, and unreasonable requirements because if she can last a few more years she can get the pension that will provide for her retirement.

After a lay-off, a person takes a mediocre or terrible job in sheer desperation to pay the bills, and can’t seem to escape the drudgery.

After twenty years in the same job, bored and frustrated but trapped by the golden chains of good benefits, pay and lifestyle, a person sacrifices their well-being and their passion to maintaining the status quo.

The trap of an unpleasant job is often very practical – there are bills to pay. There is a way to regain your sense of self, personal satisfaction, and even joy in the midst of a bad environment, a boring job, and unreasonable requirements. Although it’s easy to blame the circumstances of your employment, the solution is actually internal. The solution is to discover who you ‘be,’ and bring that to work. It’s a private result that may be totally invisible to those around you – or they may notice you’re a lot more cheerful.

Although most people know something of who they are, their internal chatter tends to provide the list they consider faults rather than gifts. People learn their weaknesses and strengths and how to accommodate those to cope with job requirements. It’s common to hear people’s awareness of their strengths and weaknesses.

‘I know I procrastinate, but I do my best work under pressure.’
‘My desk may look a mess, but I know where everything is.’
‘I know how to use the old system better.’
‘They’ll just change the requirements, so there’s no point in putting in a lot of effort.’
‘If I was hit by a bus, they’d just hire someone else.’


A lot of people think there would be more satisfaction in their work if they did something meaningful, or world-changing, or important. And yet people with meaningful jobs experience frustration, burn-out, and despair – that’s not the answer. It’s a lot easier to pretend that’s the answer, because blaming the circumstances of your situation lets you off the hook. If you accept that internal change makes a difference, then you become responsible for your experience – that’s just annoying. However, it has the huge benefit of allowing you to achieve happiness. It’s amazing what people will do to avoid being happy, while claiming happiness is what they want.

A discussion with a professional woman reveals the type of conflict that people face inside themselves:
“I really want to be laid off. I’d get a package that would give me options.”
“What would it take to get laid off?”
“Probably bad reviews.”
“What do you need to do to get bad reviews?”
“I can’t do that. I won’t do a bad job. I have my pride.”

Contrary to popular belief, most people prefer to be competent achievers who make a meaningful contribution. It makes them feel good. If you feel good about yourself, it’s a lot easier to cope with unpleasant circumstances. The key to feeling good about yourself is to recognize the unique gift you bring to your workplace, which may not be apparent in the tasks of your job.

There are people who are confidantes – the person everyone talks to, and manages the emotional state of personnel. There are visionaries, who see beyond the existing situation to what could be – the people with ideas. There are organizers, who remember processes, and catch little things, and know how to make things happen. There are communicators, who explain things in ways that others understand, and make the requirements clear. There are leaders, who understand the different motivations of various people, and help them feel inspired to work. You have a unique gift that is an expression of your being, that you bring to every situation you are in. You bring it to work.

People can’t help but be who they are: the challenge is to recognize what that is, so you can feel the fulfillment of being. When you can identify your gift and how your gift contributes to your performance in your job, the environment of your workplace, and the well-being of those you care about, then you can feel fulfilled by being you – whatever your tasks happen to be. The joy of expressing your being is different than any other kind of satisfaction, and cannot be shaken by other people, lousy circumstances, or crappy work. It’s yours because it’s you.

For more information about being you in the workplace, you can request a free CD: Investors Group Financial Services Presents Patricia Wall: Change Your Job, Or Change You In Your Job. Contact Rick Ford: rick.ford@investorsgroup.com or 613- -591-7639 x225.

 


  

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